I was in my bathroom alone only about five times for the first two years of my daughter’s life. I’m only exaggerating a little bit. Small children do not appreciate nor understand the desire for privacy. I still marvel in those moments when I’m washing my hair and no one is talking, jumping on, or splashing me.

More often than not, mothers set the emotional tone for the family. Put whatever adjective you want in front of the word mama and you can bet that that same word applies to the whole family. Cranky mama = cranky family. Try it out: happy, mad, exuberant, stressed, and so on. It’s true.

My point is that mothers need sanctuary. Many mothers out there are working one (or more) jobs, coming home to make eight courses because nobody wants to eat the same thing, giving baths, reading books, tucking in, singing songs, and when they stop to pee there’s somebody standing alongside offering a blow-by-blow story about school to rival The Day Jimmy’s Boa Ate the Wash. Mothers eke out the very last bit of energy they have at the end of a very long day because they have an endless well of love. There’s simply no other explanation.

The greatest gift most moms could ask for is a little peace. Hot coffee and the newspaper on the deck (alone). A long soak in the bathtub (alone). A walk around the block (alone). A matinee (alone). You get my drift. The benefits will come back ten-fold.